Here To Eat: Ace Eats America 10 Plates at a Time

Price: $3.99
Rating: ** / *****

Those of you who have kept up with my blog may wonder how I'm still alive after eating all this crap. I'm not sure, but I think it has something to do with voodoo and the alignment of certain planets. I'm thinking that this may not work forever so I decided to try a more organic source of food. The fine people at HeatEatReview are always talking about this mysterious entity called "Whole Foods". I have always been intrigued by this concept. Is food not already whole? Have I been eating half food my whole life? I still don't have that answer, but I made a trip down to Whole Foods for the first time today.

As soon as I stepped into the store, I felt like I had walked into a mysterious closet leading to some drug-induced land. The store was bright and bustling with people fighting over the newest tofu varieties and pita chips. There were products that I didn't even know existed. Out were Cocoa Puffs and Frosted Flakes, in were organic granola and grains that I thought only existed in ancient Egypt. I was grinning ear to ear like a maniac for a good five minutes, thinking "What have I gotten myself into?"

I eventually found my destination: the frozen food aisle. I picked up a few different meals, all with promises of organic pleasure. This one is from Amy's. She seems like a nice gal. The back of the box indicates that the Indian meals her company offers were developed by talking to three of their Indian friends. I'm too sure if three is a big enough sample size for a country of over a billion, but I will give them the benefit of the doubt. Sadly, the meal was a disappointment. It consisted of curried vegetables(onions, potatoes, peas, cailiflower, carrots, tomatoes, green bell peppers, cashews), dal(lentils and peas), and rice. While the vegetables were thankfully not pureed, both the dal and vegetables were far too mild for my taste. This is coming from a guy who eats Flaming Hot Cheetos with a glass of milk. I knew it would be mild, but it is downright weak. You only get a hint of the curry and not much else coming through. The dal was surprisingly soupy, so that didn't make eating it any more fun.

This is too bad because the rice was nicely separated and tasted fine. If the curry gave me any reason to eat more of it, I am sure it would be a worthy side. It wasn't your fault, rice. Really, rice, you were the lone bright spot of the meal. There's no reason for you to get mad. I didn't want to throw you away, honestly. Put that down! Mr. Rice, don't take out your anger out on me! Get back! Get back!

Mr. Rice, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

...

Uhh...I'm sorry, that really didn't happen or make much sense, I just wanted to throw in a Simpsons reference. Anyway, I really wanted to enjoy this meal, I really did, but I can't justify paying $4 for something that doesn't pack much punch in the flavor department.

Posted by Anthony Nguyen on Monday, November 13, 2006 at 5:34 PM | Permalink